I’ve been leading teams for over 20 years now. Big teams, small teams, it doesn’t matter. Somewhere along the way, I noticed a funny little habit that never fails to make me squirm.
Some people call me “boss.”
And honestly? It makes me want to puke. (Yes, really!)
Why does this happen?
I’ve asked myself this many times. Why do employees like to call their leader “boss”?
Is it habit? A cultural thing? A way to show respect? Or maybe just the easiest shorthand for “you’re the one in charge”?
On the surface, it seems harmless. But every time someone says, “Boss, can I get your approval?” or “Thanks, boss!”…something inside me recoils.
Maybe it’s just me.
To be fair, I’ve never called my own boss – “boss.” It feels unnatural to me. If I know your name, why wouldn’t I just use it? Maybe that’s why I struggle so much when people call me that.
Is it weird? Probably. Is there some psychological wiring in me that rejects authority labels? Possibly.
But I can’t help but feel that when someone calls me “boss,” it creates a gap between us. Like I’m suddenly sitting on a higher chair than them, and they’re looking up at me. That’s not how I want my team to feel.
What does “boss” really mean?
I sometimes wonder, what does it make a person feel when they’re called “boss”?
For some, maybe it’s flattering. Maybe it strokes the ego, reminds them that they have power, authority, that final say. But to me, it feels… wrong.
Leadership, at least in my eyes, isn’t about being superior. It’s about being responsible with the team, not above the team.
So when someone calls me “boss,” I feel like the dynamic shifts. I’m not part of the circle anymore. I’m the figurehead on the pedestal. And I’ve never wanted to lead from a pedestal.
The culture question…
Is this the right culture in the corporate world? To normalise calling leaders “boss”?
Maybe in some places, yes. In certain environments, it’s a term of endearment or respect, almost like saying “Sir” or “Madam.” But if I’m being real, it irks me because it feels transactional. It reduces the relationship to rank and title, not trust and collaboration.
I’ve always believed culture should be about openness. About being able to challenge ideas, share thoughts, and laugh together without feeling a constant reminder of hierarchy.
So why do employees like to call their boss – “boss”? I don’t have the perfect answer. Habit, culture, respect? Maybe all of the above.
But I know why it irks me: because I don’t see myself as “the boss.”
I see myself as part of the team. The one steering, yes, but still rowing together.
And maybe, just maybe, that’s why I’ll never be comfortable with the word.
Call me by my name. That’s enough.
At the end of the day, a boss is a title.
A leader is a role.
Which one do we wanna be remembered by?
Written by A. Balancing duty in public service and care at home, she writes from the heart of both worlds.